We Can Be Better

We can do be better… as individuals, as a nation, as a global community. Amidst all of the confusion, stress, mixed messages and unknowns of the novel coronavirus pandemic, George Floyd died in police custody in Minneapolis a week ago. This sparked a protest in Minneapolis that turned into looting and rioting. Things escalated quickly as protests and riots erupted in other major cities in the US, in Europe and at least one prison. Just like the coronavirus situation, it is almost impossible to keep up with the news. New data points are still emerging, most people have opinions.

My personal philosophy is to be a Connector and a Catalyst. There are so many possible connections to be made between the VUCA worlds of living in the coronavirus pandemic and dealing with the current social unrest. The main idea I’d like people to intentionally connect with is: both are complex, systemic issues. As a catalyst, I would encourage people to figure out what they can do to help create and support change at an individual and system level.

How?

First, do what you need to do. I’m starting here:

Agile Best Self Principle #10: Simplicity – focusing on what energizes your best self — is paramount.

When I’m upset, one of my first impulses is to figure out a way forward. My default stance is action. As the pandemic unfolded, I researched what I could and decided what actions I would take. With the Floyd riots (and the underlying cause of systemic racial oppression) my short-term action is to help where I can. Part of this is financial support, part of it using my vote wisely, part is reaching out to my friends I know that are impacted, and asking “How can I help?”

When I’m really, really upset, I need to disengage. In the past 7 days I’ve cycled through the engage / disengage loop multiple times. But that is ok. It is intentional. I’ve named the pattern, and I’ve given myself space to focus on my self.

When I think about the kind of future I want to live in, and the kind of future I want my son to have. I pushed the anger, devastation and frustration aside to think about what I want to see. The best I could come up with was “we can do better”. I can do better, and I’m calling on our like-hearted community to figure out how each of us can do better, myself included, in the service of others who need our support and advocacy.

Agile Best Self Principle #1: Our highest priority is to be our best self and enable others to be their best selves.

Just to bring it all back to Agile Best Self Principles, not only can we do better, we can be better.

Copyright © 2018 – 2026 Michaele Gardner and Brian Hackerson

Get Back

When I saw this image this morning, it resonated with me. It reminded me of how my week started.

Monday was probably one of my toughest days during this COVID-19/isolation/work-at-home period so far. I went into it with a spirit of optimism and high expectations — I wanted to start fast from a writing perspective, having met my personal writing output goal from last week. The weekend weather was beautiful, and I got to spend a lot of time outside. All systems were go – there was nothing in the air going into Monday that was keeping me from getting off to that fast start.

It started like most every other day — my morning walk, a shower, breakfast and a little bit of news. I sat down to start writing, and it was one of those days were the words were hard to come by. I quickly got frustrated. Midday I went into a conversation with a colleague in my network, and I noticed right away that I wasn’t showing up the way I wanted. Some family group texting happened that irritated me. I ended up getting pretty much nowhere. No doubt this feeling of irritation was magnified by the fact I am isolated due to work from home.

Looks like the left image on the picture above, right? The squiggle mess? I am sure this happens to all of us at some point. So, what do you do about it? After my scheduled meetings had completed for the day, I read through the Agile Best Self Principles again looking for something to grab onto, like a life buoy to someone who has fallen overboard into the ocean. Hooray for Principle 10!

Agile Best Self Principle #10: Simplicity – focusing on what energizes your best self — is paramount.

Cy Wakeman is a drama researcher. Her Reality-Based Leadership research and teachings center on drama in the workplace. I remember her talk at Scrum Day Minnesota 2017 where she quantified the impact of drama to be 2.5 hours per day. At the root of this drama we find the ego (or as I like to call it, the Inner Critic) who is crafting the inner dialogue that can create the noise. This noise drowns out reality; stops us from moving forward; and sends us headlong into wallowing in drama. What I appreciate most about her teaching, is that there is a simple way to redirect the inner dialogue into something more productive. Empathy.

Here’s a link to a video of Cy’s TEDx talk that includes a very personal story.

Looking to get my inner dialogue back on track, I leverage the simplicity of Cy’s drama deflection strategy. The question is: what do I know for sure?

  • According to the news, the current state of affairs in the world, including the COVID-19 pandemic just plain sucks, but I am doing what I can to help by staying home
  • The opinions my colleague has are just that, opinions. Given that person’s frame of reference, these opinions are logical and reflect their personal journey and experience. They are not casting judgment on me or the choices I am making in my own journey
  • My siblings wanted to simplify Mother’s Day gift-buying by working together. Everyone pitch in $25

Drama diffused. Inner Critic disarmed. The yarn ball is untangling — we’re moving to the right on the image.

Moving Right Along….

The second question in the drama deflection strategy is: what can I do to help? I’ve got this.

  • Quit watching the news. Trust what you are doing is helping the world, even in a small way
  • Keep the focus on my own journey, and do what’s best for me. There is enough food on the table for everyone to have plenty
  • Paypal, $25, tap, tap, done

I am moving even closer to the right side of the image now.

Moving Even Further Along

The third and final question of the drama diffusion strategy is: what does great look like right now? This is a Jedi mind trick. What I have learned, from the neuroscience perspective: a question such as this moves the brain activity to the part of the brain where innovation happens. For me, “greatness” in these circumstances means getting back to work on my journey while I have this valuable time away from work.

The process of freeing my brain from the noise of the Inner Critic, leading to getting myself back on track with the writing I wanted to finish, looked a lot like the image on top of the page. In this story, I was able to make it all the way to the diagram on the far right. I was energized, focused and clear. I was on the straight line.

Liverpool, UK – October 30 2019: Signs showcasing the beatles band in Liverpool, UK
Credit: ink drop – stock.adobe.com

“Get back…Get back…Get back to where you once belonged” is a lyric from an old Beatles song. Get Back was one of the songs in the last live performance by the band, the famous rooftop concert at Apple Records in 1969. In the midst of this week, hearing this song got me thinking. Where I belong, as I learned (with an assist going to Principle 10), is on my best self journey — being the best, authentic version of me that I can be today.

Tap. Tap. Done.

Copyright © 2018 – 2026 Michaele Gardner and Brian Hackerson