I Suck At Optimism

blur close up dark focus
Photo by Thorn Yang on Pexels.com

I’m doing my best to fill that glass up, but today is just not the day. Maybe I don’t 100% suck at optimism, but I’m much better at gratitude. I’m not sure why gratitude is easier for me, but I’m glad that optimism is a skill that can be learned.

My nightly gratitude practice has been in place for over a year. On and off, for over 5 years. Maybe that is why I feel stronger in my gratitude practice than in my ability to be optimistic. Maybe my gratitude habit just flows better because it is easier to dissect something that has already happened.

Maybe it is because today just sucks. Some days are harder than others. Sometimes the bad days sneak up on you (unexpectedly getting laid off, accidents, falling ill, fights with loved ones, unexpected deaths), and sometimes you have a warning (funerals, memorial services, upcoming birthdays of loved ones that have passed). I knew this would be a rough weekend in advance.

The main point is that it takes a long time to build up any skill, optimism included. This morning I had a difficult time thinking about this post. To be honest, I seriously considered asking Brian to write today’s post for me. This would violate our agreement of alternately writing posts. More importantly, after that first thought flitted through my head: “Just have Brian do it”. My immediate response was: “No, you have to do it. And you have to do it specifically because today is hard.”

I didn’t ask Brian to step in because I have to do the heavy lifting myself. Like all the skills and mindset shifts we talk about in Agile Best Self, learning the skill of being optimistic is hard. I will make mistakes; I will go down rabbit holes. I will look for experts who can give me an easy button. I will get frustrated. I will want it to be linear and logical. I will have to stop myself and give myself permission to be angry and sad and not perfect.

The paradox of this work is that I have to go it alone while I am surrounded and supported by my like-hearted community and trusted circle.

I have have a long way to go. And that is ok. I know y’all have my back. And that helps me know that it is all going to work out.

Copyright © 2018 – 2026 Michaele Gardner and Brian Hackerson

Let’s Talk About Optimism: A New Series

This image reminded me of my father, for some reason, this morning. He would describe himself as an “eternal optimist” — which of the pictures of above glasses would best describe this?

I used to think that optimism was a personality trait, and I probably inherited it from him through genetics. I believed this is the way I was wired. As such, I thought that I saw the world as glass half full, like the picture in the middle. It’s not to say I didn’t inherit certain personality from him, but I have come to learn that optimism is something different, with a lot of potential to create a better life.

Michaele and I have decided to start a new series of posts, building upon the momentum of our posts on gratitude. We hopefully have demonstrated that there is value in building a gratitude practice, especially now. The topic for this next series is optimism.

Let’s start with a definition we can build on together.

“Optimism is a trainable skill and it’s the fundamental belief that it’s going to work out.”

Dr. Michael Gervais, Co-Creator of Compete to Create

Using this definition, I have come to believe that optimism can be trained. So, let’s use this series to explore optimism together. We will explore what optimism is, how it is similar or different to positivity or positive thinking, and some tips and tricks to building optimism. And more stories of optimism in our lives that hopefully inspire optimism in your life.

Agile Best Self Principle #5: Create a best self environment of motivation, trust, and support for yourself and others.

Bringing it back to the Agile Best Self Principles, this is a big part of what Principle 5 is all about. Optimism is a big part of building our own environment of motivation, trust and support so that we can help others.

Let’s build the skill of optimism together.

Copyright © 2018 – 2026 Michaele Gardner and Brian Hackerson